Hot Boys

Today a list of the 25 hottest men in Hollywood was released. Travesty of travesties, my boyfriend Robert Downey, Jr. was not number one. Who was? Well...

25. Josh Duhamel
24. Matthew McConaughey
23. Will Smith
22. Christian Bale
21. Nigel Barker
20. Simon Baker (who I always confuse with Thomas Jane)
19. Jason Statham
18. Robert Downey, Jr. (ROBBED!!!)
17. Daniel Craig
16. Patrick Dempsey
15. Mario Lopez
14. Jake Gyllenhaal
13. Anderson Cooper
12. Gabriel Aubrey
11. Joshua Jackson (yay Pacey!)
10. Leonardo DiCaprio
9. Mark Wahlberg
8. Brad Pitt
7. Robert Pattinson
6. Djimon Hounsou
5. George Clooney
4. Ryan Reynolds
3. Gerard Butler
2. David Beckham
1. Josh Brolin

Okay, what??? While I'm glad to see no Jonas brothers here, why are there so many unattractive men on this list? Who decided this? Where are Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, Ewen McGregor, Thomas Jane, Callum Blue and Freddie Rodriguez? How in the hell did Becks and Marky Mark get on this list? And why is Leo DiCaprio so puffy? He's starting to resemble Boy George, with hair. And Robert Pattinson and his unibrow have only been famous for like 5 minutes. Has Twilight even come out yet?

Grrr... Readers, who else is missing or doesn't deserve to be on this list (like Josh Douche-hamel)? Give me some more names! And, as a pre-participation treat, here's Jordan Catalano: