The Blockbuster Conspiracy

I think Blockbuster has taken control of my queue. Honestly.

I managed to get my queue down to like 40 movies through a combination of renting-watching-returning quickly, exchanging the online rentals for in-store rentals and just generally being really, really bored. But suddenly, my queue is up to 92 movies, not counting the one I have and the two they are sending me now. A total of 95 movies. And not one of them is a film I've ever seen before. I challenge anyone to name 95 movies they've never seen that they would like to. Mike? Kim? Katie? I bet you can't do it.

And there are movies on my queue I've never even heard of! The Secret? A Hole in One? Confessions of an American Girl? If anyone knows anything about these movies, please, share your knowledge because I am at a loss.

But, if I've never heard of them, where did they come from?

My theory is that it's a big conspiracy cooked up by the guys at Blockbuster HQ (that's headquarters, for those of you too smart to think in acronyms). First, they are attempting to manage customer retention by ensuring that the lists contain more movies than any one person of average social appeal could every possibly get through. That way, if they are ever considering discontinuing their service, they will look at their queue and think, "Oh, but there are 238 movies here I want to see. I guess I'll keep it.

Second, I think they're trying to mess with me. I'm sure there's a guy in processing sitting around looking at people's queues and thinking to himself, "Hm, this is such a long queue, I bet she won't even notice if I add The Road Home to her list. I bet she'll even let it go so far that she watches it. Hey, Ferguson!! I got $20 says this girl watches The Road Home!! You in?!?!" (That last part was shouting across the office to Ferguson, the office whipping boy. I'll tell you about Ferguson some other time.)

So, yeah, Blockbuster is messing with my queue and messing with my head. And I have no idea what The Road Home is about, but Ferguson is probably about to lose $20, because it's working its way up the list.